Suicide is an important topic in Alaska, as the state has one of the highest suicide rates per capita in the country. According to the Statewide Suicide Prevention Council, in 2014 there were 22.3 suicides per 100,000 people across Alaska. As such, several community members have wanted to know how they can help those around them who are struggling with suicidal thoughts.
Along with some cafe-style discussions on the topic of suicide prevention put together by SEARHC, “safeTALK” training was held at the Nolan Center last Thursday and Friday. SafeTALK is a workshop designed by LivingWorks, an organization that works to teach people about how they can help prevent suicides and support others in their community who might be struggling. According to their website, safeTALK is designed to teach people how to recognize warning signs that someone might be considering suicide, engaging them, and connecting them with further support.
The training at the Nolan Center was lead by Cathleen Pook and Monica Chase, with SEARHC. The workshop also featured video instructions for people to watch. The “TALK” in safeTALK is an acronym for what people should do if they, or someone they know is having suicidal thoughts: Tell, Ask, Listen, and Keep safe.
“Tell” is meant for the person considering suicide. It may seem counterintuitive, Pook said, but in general a person thinking about suicide does not mean that person wants to die. It is very likely that they will be asking for help, even if it is in a vague or not obvious way.
“They don’t want to die, or at least some part of them wants to live,” Pook said. “This is almost always the case, right up to and including the time of dying, doubt will remain. Usually doubt is stronger.”
If someone is considering suicide, they should tell somebody as clearly as possible. Of course, this is not always an easy thing to do. That is where “Ask” comes into play. If someone believes that someone they know is thinking about killing themselves, they need to ask about it. There are some warning signs or invitations, as they were called, to keep an eye out for. These include becoming moody or withdrawing from others, abusing drugs or alcohol, or just in general caring less about everything. Other invitations can be found in their speech, too. If someone talks a lot about being a burden, or feeling hopeless, or vaguely talking about having an “escape” or “solution,” they may be thinking about suicide. It is also a good idea to closely watch someone who has gone through a tough time, such as a major rejection or loss.
“So if you ask someone about suicide, you don’t want to do it non-directly, where you kind of condescend,” Chase said. “That can very much give them a sense that they’re being disregarded and what they’re feeling is disregarded, or that you may be uncomfortable dealing with the thoughts of suicide that they may or may not be having, so ask directly.”
An example the workshop gave on how to directly ask if someone is thinking about suicide is to mention the invitations one has seen in the person they are asking, and then to just simply ask, “Are you thinking about suicide?”
After “Ask” comes “Listen,” which is fairly straightforward. It is not the job of the person asking to have a magic cure for their problems, they just need to be an ear to hear and a shoulder to cry on for a while. It is important, while listening, to reassure them that what they are talking about is important, and that you are empathizing and paying attention to them.
The final step is “Keep safe,” which involves getting the person considering suicide to someone better equipped to help them. The person who just opened up may ask that their thoughts be kept secret, which is something the asker should never do. The person shouldn’t be left alone until they are passed off to someone who can help. This can be a crisis center, a hospital, a counselor, or a religious leader, to name a few examples. The training provided in the workshop said it is a good idea to have contact information for some of these people or organizations easily accessible, if they are ever needed.
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